Introduction by GiftedKids.in
The report card starts slipping and the explanations arrive fast. Not applying himself. Careless. Doesn't listen. Another tuition gets added, and then a third, because more hours is the only lever anyone knows how to pull.
What almost nobody checks is whether the child is bored. Dr Inderbir Kaur Sandhu on why ability and achievement come apart, and what actually closes the gap.
“My child is so capable, but why is school becoming such a struggle?”
A Concern I Often Hear From Parents
Many people assume gifted children naturally enjoy school and perform well. However, this is not always the case. Over the years, I have met many gifted children who love learning but dislike school.
This difference is important. Learning and schooling are not always the same experience.
A child may have a deep passion for science, history or problem-solving, yet struggle with repetitive tasks, slow pacing or work that does not feel meaningful.
Why Gifted Children May Struggle
Gifted children can experience difficulties for many reasons. Some become bored when they are not sufficiently challenged. Others develop perfectionism and avoid tasks where success is not guaranteed.
Some children have advanced reasoning skills but weaker organisation, planning or attention skills. This can confuse adults because the child appears highly capable in some situations yet struggles in others.
What I Have Learnt From My Assessment Room
One pattern I have seen repeatedly is that adults sometimes ask, “If this child is so smart, why can’t they just do it?”
The answer is that ability does not remove challenges. Gifted children are still developing children. They need guidance, support and opportunities to develop resilience, persistence and effective learning habits.
Understanding the reason behind the struggle is far more useful than assuming a child is lazy or not trying hard enough.
How Parents Can Help
Parents can support gifted children by:
- Focusing on effort and growth rather than perfection.
- Providing appropriate challenges.
- Helping children learn organisation and coping skills.
- Encouraging healthy attitudes towards mistakes and failure.
- Working with schools to understand the child’s learning needs.
Myth vs Reality
Gifted children will succeed on their own.
Gifted children also need guidance, encouragement and environments that allow their abilities to develop.
Dr Inderbir's Reflection
One of the most important lessons I have learnt is that potential does not automatically become achievement.
Gifted children do not need constant pressure to perform. They need adults who understand their strengths, recognise their struggles and help them develop the skills to thrive.
Success is not simply about how much ability a child has. It is about how that ability is nurtured.
Want to Learn More?
Dr Inderbir Kaur Sandhu is a psychologist, gifted education specialist and author of The Secret to Raising a Smarter Child. With over two decades of experience working with gifted and twice-exceptional children, she specialises in understanding how children think, learn and thrive. Her work focuses on cognitive assessment, talent development and helping families nurture children's strengths while supporting their social and emotional development.